Adam-Troy Castro

Writer of Science Fiction, Fantasy, Horror, and Stories About Yams.

 

There Was Never Any Possibility of Trump Attending the Dinner

Posted on February 26th, 2017 by Adam-Troy Castro
The White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner has always been a terrible idea.

 

At its worst it’s demonstrated just how cold and unfeeling the Administration is: i.e. the “comedic” film of Dubya looking for weapons of mass destruction in his office, while actual, you know, human beings were dying by the score for that wild goose chase.

 

At its best — Colbert’s year — it’s been a place for accomplished satirists to speak truth to power, but at its worst, it’s been a place for Administrations to pretend that they like being satirized, by approving only those comedians who can be trusted not to say anything controversial — most egregiously, Rich Little. (Boy, those Eddie Cantor impressions!)

 

Once in a bloody great well it’s been an occasion for greatness, as when Barack Obama went and did his shtick while keeping silent on the knowledge that, even as he spoke, the raid to get Bin Laden was under way.

 

But it was never going to work this year. You can’t have a “Ha ha ha, we’re all going to show we can laugh at ourselves” event when the President is a guy with no discernable sense of humor who goes ballistic when anybody makes a joke at his expense, and when the speech he would have to give as last word would not be a series of identifiable jokes so much as a series of vicious slurs directed at a profession that he will accept only as sycophant or enemy. Can you even imagine Trump’s monologue at this thing? Another reference to the size of his crowds, another rant to the effect that they’re all a bunch of traitors and liars.

 

This was not just a likelihood; this was an absolute bloody certainty. You can’t have what amounts to a celebrity roast when the guest of honor won’t permit anyone to make jokes about him, and when his response will amount to an entitled “Fuck You All.”

(And yes, by the way: I know that, before his Presidency, Trump permitted himself to be roasted on MTV, once. And before agreeing to attend he demanded — and, scandalously, received — full veto power on the things the performers were allowed to mock him for. The color of his hair, yes; whether his hair was real, no. The way he talked, yes. The idiocy of the things he said, no. Standard-issue jokes about how rich he was, yes. Any jokes about his string of bankruptcies, his massive debt, his business practices, his racism, no. He demanded that his roast be content-free. And then he got up and excoriated Rosie O’Donnell. That was not a roast. That was a massage. You want to know what a megalomaniac this guy is? With the power to demand a Rich Little, someone whose jokes will land with the impact of a light spring rain, he still refuses to attend the Correspondent’s dinner; he knows, too well, that he cannot afford the possibility that any of what got said might land with the impact of truth.)

8 Responses to "There Was Never Any Possibility of Trump Attending the Dinner"

  1. No problem, just have Alex Baldwin do it instead.

  2. I think he just doesn’t expect to still be president by April.

  3. I was hoping that address would serve as his swan song..

  4. I really thought he might do it. I also expected him to ask Bill Cosby to headline.

  5. It is always a good idea….duh. It normalizes politicians and the press……..substitute “exposes” for “normalizes” if you like…..

  6. I don’t want to make a lazy, generic “Nazi” analogy, but just a specific memory: years ago, Bill Moyers interviewed a former Nazi propagandist named Fritz Hippler. Hippler described how he, Goebbels, and Der Fuhrer screened a British propaganda film. The brilliant short film used clips of Hitler and the other Nazis set to whimsical music, with footage stopped, reversed, and repeated to make it look like they were dancing. When the lights went up, Fritz Hippler was very afraid because Adolf Hitler was red-faced with rage, and proceeded to go on a long, profane tirade against the British. Arrogant authoritarians cannot take any jokes directed against them.

  7. He hasn’t gotten over any of the previous ones he attended as a guest!

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